Normally, I’m very appreciative of all the FTC has done to protect consumer privacy and our data. But boy, did they blow it this time.
On April 30, the FTC issued the following release:
Mom has gone out of her way for you over the years. On Mother’s Day, let her know you’re doing the same for her. Send her a musical e-card with tips from the Federal Trade Commission on keeping her personal information secure. The free card, available in English and Spanish at www.ftc.gov/mom and www.ftc.gov/madre, reminds moms to:
- safeguard their Social Security numbers;
- check their bills and bank statements carefully;
- be cautious and check out offers that come via telephone or e-mail; and
- report fraud to the FTC.
On behalf of the entire staff of PogoWasRight.org (that would be me), this is simply not acceptable.
It is not okay to just send your mother a free musical e-card for Mother’s Day. Perhaps the FTC meant to write:
Mom has gone out of her way for you over the years. On Mother’s Day, and in addition to making her breakfast in bed and all of the other wonderful gifts you intend to lavish her with, let her know how to protect her privacy….
I hope the FTC will immediately rectify its humongous error. In the alternative, I am posting this memo to my own children:
Dear Kids,
Do not listen to the FTC on this. I HATE e-cards of any type, and especially musical e-cards. Personally, I have to wonder if they have issues with their own mothers and have come up with this campaign out of spite. I will leave that for their therapists to address. In any event:
It is NOT okay to just send an e-card under any circumstances to the mother who brought you into this world, helped you with your homework, cooked for you, and put up with all your shenanigans over the years.
If you really want to give me a nice Mother’s Day, a few plants for the garden would be nice. Actually, I’d trade the plants for you just cleaning your rooms and getting your junk out of my living room and dining room.
As Bill Cosby famously said, “I brought you into this world, and I can take you right out.” Remember that as Mother’s Day approaches.
Love,
Mom